pariswriter: (Default)
Title:  A Friend Lost, A Love Found
Author:  ParisWriter
Game:  Dragon Age: Origins
Summary:  The loss of one of Varia's closest friends pushes Cullen to finally cross the line he's been so very careful to remain behind.
Rating:  K+/PG
Characters:  Varia Surana; Cullen
Disclaimer:  Cullen from the Dragon Age series ©BioWare. Varia Surana belongs to me.


A Friend Lost, A Love Found

Varia sat alone in the First Enchanter's study, staring blankly at the floor as tears silently streamed down her face. She hadn't been prepared for the news of Jocelyn's failed Harrowing and had taken it much harder than Irving had expected. He had hated leaving her alone, but he needed to take care of the paperwork and preparations for the girl's funeral in a timely manner.

So he had sent Cullen to sit with her.

The young templar hovered in the doorway of the room, simply watching her. He had lost his own family one by one over the years – his mother in childbirth, his younger sister and father both to sickness – but he still had no idea what to say in order to comfort someone who was going through the pain of losing a close friend. What made matters worse was the fact that what he wanted to do to comfort her would end up getting them both into a world of trouble if they were caught.

He had stopped trying to deny his feelings for her weeks ago – at least to himself. He still pretended not to have any romantic inclinations toward her in the presence of his fellow templars, but he couldn't help the way his heart sped up and his palms started to sweat whenever she was near him. What had started out as an almost brotherly need to protect her from the wolves hiding within the templar ranks had turned into infatuation. The Knight-Commander had warned him to stay away from her, but he couldn't. She was too beautiful, too sweet, too... perfect in every way. The only thing wrong with her was that she was a mage – not that he really minded the fact she was a mage, but as a templar he was forbidden to fraternize with them, much less fall in love with one.

It was too late, though. Even with his lack of experience when it came to women, he knew in his heart that he was already falling in love with her.

Taking a deep breath, he finally entered the room and crossed to the small wooden bench where she was sitting. She gasped softly when she looked up at him, probably expecting to see one of the other templars come to take advantage of her emotional state, then she visibly relaxed when her eyes met his. Cullen opened his mouth to express his condolences for her loss, but found himself at a lack of words. The tears in her grey eyes made the silver flecks in them sparkle under the light of the arcane lamp hanging on the nearby wall, and he became mesmerized by them.

He reached out with one of his armored hands and gently touched her cheek, and she let out a small sigh. Craving more contact, he quickly removed the gauntlet on his hand – fumbling momentarily with the straps before finally pulling it off – and once more traced the delicate lines of her cheek and jaw with his fingertips. Her eyes fell closed and she reached up to place her own hand upon his, pressing the palm of his hand fully against her cheek.

Cullen was lost. He knew it was wrong, but he couldn't help himself. He leaned over her and gently pressed his lips to hers for a brief moment before pulling away. Varia's eyes opened and looked up into his, and her hands moved to the back of his neck to pull his mouth down to hers once more. Cullen gave in to his desires, gently moving his lips over hers, tasting her tears when he instinctively reached out to touch her lips with the tip of his tongue.

Varia responded by threading her fingers into his hair, mimicking his actions by tentatively reaching out with her own tongue. Cullen could barely suppress the moan that wanted to crawl its way out of his throat when he felt her tracing his bottom lip. His hand moved to the back of her head, supporting her as he tilted her head back and dared to be a bit more demanding with his kiss. He tangled his tongue with hers, coaxing her to open her mouth, then delved inside to explore the sweet warmth. All the while, his head was swimming. Any moment, someone else could walk into the First Enchanter's study and catch them in the midst of their passionate embrace... and it would end in disaster for both of them.

His head immediately cleared when he realized she would end up being punished because of his own inability to keep his emotions in check, and he quickly pulled away from her. Varia blinked at him, her lips swollen and slightly parted and her expression full of confusion and hurt, and Cullen had to clench his hands into fists at his sides to stop himself from pulling her to him and kissing her until he passed out from the lack of oxygen.

Yes, he was certainly in over his head. Maker forgive him, but he was in love with a mage. It went against all of the vows he had taken, but he couldn't help himself.

He quickly muttered an apology to Varia before leaving the room, heading straight to the tower's small chapel to pray.

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